I can’t believe I’m doing this. It’s 1.30 am on Christmas morning and instead of being in bed asleep I’m writing. And before you say “if you don’t go to bed soon Santa won’t come” well, ha-ha-ha! Very funny. I’m not stupid, he never gets to me until 4.
The reason I am up is that I have just been to midnight mass with Keith. We were going with his Mum, but when I called to pick him up he said that his Mum had decided not to come. I think he thought he was going to get out of it, but I was having none of it.
Anyway, we eventually set off up the road with him moaning and groaning about being cold, which was daft because it wasn’t cold at all. We got to the church about 11.15 by which time there was hardly a pew to be had. But we found a couple of spaces near the back. Well, at this service we only have candlelight, and he started complaining that he was too far away from the nearest candle and he couldn’t see. But then he choir burst through the door to our left, and his little face light up. I think you know that he is passionate about church choirs and the one at our church is exceptional.
All was going well, despite Keith yawning rather a lot. But I did have a bit of a scare when at the end of a long prayer we all sat up but Keith didn’t! He stayed head-down. Then I realised he was asleep. Fortunately he didn’t snore like he does at the movies. He is the world’s greatest authority on the beginnings and ends of films. I swear he thinks that movies are all 20 minutes long and don’t make sense!
When I’d called for him he was just writing an email t our friend in Oz, Mr Whitesnake. Steve the snake said that at midnight UK time he’d raise a glass to Keith. Keith replied that he would be at Mass at the time, and said that he’d toast Steve with the communion wine. I assumed he was joking, but I swear that as he took a sip of the ‘blood of Christ’ he muttered ‘Cheers Steve’. He strongly denies it, and says ‘Amen’ sounds like ‘Cheers Steve’. Nonsense I say. I told him he’ll never go to heaven if he gets up to tricks like that.
When I mentioned recently to his daughter Rachel that I was going to church with him, she broke into a grin and suggested I pretend not to be with him because he insists on singing the harmony during every hymn – loudly! She said that when she was young she found it a bit embarrassing. But it wasn’t a problem tonight. I think he was too tired to bother, until.......
The final carol was that biggy, the loudest one in the book ‘Oh Come all Ye Faithful’ and suddenly Keith perked up. He harmonised quite quietly at first. But during the carol the choir processed toward our part of the church and as they got louder, he got louder. Well the last verse is huge, and now the choir were standing behind and beside us. You would have thought he was auditioning for a leading role! He belted it out.
Anyway, I made sure he got home safely and now I’m back in my apartment. I really do have to go to bed now, suddenly my clock tells me its 2am and Mummy and Daddy will be here at the crack of dawn demanding coffee and things. Why do old people get up so early?
Anyway have a great day – Happy Christmas!!