As I think you know, I am teachers little helper in a class of eight year olds at a local school. Right now we are getting ready for this year’s nativity play which the whole school will perform to an audience of doting parents next week.
Normally it’s all-kiddie affair, but for some reason I have been told that I have to take part in it. As far as I know the children said they would go on strike if Miss Pinkerton didn’t join them on stage!I really can’t think why, but I must confess I’m getting quite excited about it.
Right now I’m taking a break from learning my lines. I have been cast as the second tree from the right! The other trees are quite a bit smaller than me, so I do look a little odd up there with my leaves in the clouds!
Oh, I should point out that I am the only tree with a talking part as the others are made from papiere mashe. I don’t think I spelt that right, but you know what I mean – it’s that fabulously gooey stuff made from old newspaper and water and glue paste which you make models from, and stick on kids noses when teacher isn’t watching!
Anyway, I have to point to things with my branches (which are actually my arms but you’d never know it) and I say – let me get this right – “Look, a bright star.... something something” I haven’t quite got the lines in my head just yet!
I know that at one stage I have to say “Look, three wise men are approaching” And later I say just say “Look”. That’s my shortest line.
When I was small I was always given little parts in my school nativity plays. Things which couldn’t go wrong like a sheep or something. One year I was a fire! I was dressed all over in brown so I looked like logs and I had red and yellow gloves which looked like flames. I had to hold my arms in the air and wiggle my fingers, but I could never resist pinching the boys bums just as they were about to speak their lines.
In my last year of little school, my Father insisted I had a starring role. (not being the star silly!!) He was a school governor so he had a bit of clout. Well I got the job of being Mary. And if I say it myself I did it pretty well.
At least, it was going well until I had to pick up the baby Jesus from the crib, and as I did so his head fell off and rolled to the back of the stage. I had to think of something pretty damn quick!
As it happens I was sitting on some sand under a plastic palm tree which was supposed to make the set look deserty, and alongside me were a few hairy coconuts, so I grabbed one of those and held it where Jesus’ head used to be. I thought I’d got away with it until Wise Man 2 looked at it and ad-libbed “I didn’t know Jesus was born with a beard”
Well back to the matter in hand. I have to carry on practicing my lines ready for the rehearsal tomorrow, so you’ll have to excuse me. Bye for now.